Time to make the babies.

Do you remember the Dunkin' Donuts commercial where the guy gets up at the butt crack of dawn to make the donuts? And he says "Time to make the donuts"? This morning I woke up at 7 am (earlier than I would prefer after going to bed at 1 am) and hubby asked what I was doing. I told him, in the tone of the DD guy, "Time to make the babies".

In a way it is funny. All of the shots, the patches, the ultrasounds,and the pills could result in a baby. Okay, maybe not technically, but you know what I mean. In another way it is sad. Whatever happened to a romantic dinner followed by slow dancing and a candle lit room with mood music playing resulting in a baby? Or a passionate quickie, even?? When did baby making become so clinical??

Don't get me wrong, I am so very thankful for this opportunity that medical science is giving us. Without out it there would absolutely no hope for us. For that I am thankful. But it is still sad that I will never wonder why I am so tired and then assume that I have the flu only to discover that I am unexpectedly pregnant. We will never go away for a vacation and forget the contraception and then decide to throw caution in the wind and let nature take it's course and 9 months alter give birth to our "souvenir". For those of us that deal with infertility we mourn this part of our lives. We mourn the spontaneity and reckless abandon that fertiles have. We mourn the assurance that we will conceive. We mourn our innocence and naivete that existed when we first began ttc; that assumption that all was well and we would become parents in 9-12 months.

I am so thankful for this path that God has allowed us to take. Maybe not the pain of it all nor the length of time we have been on this path, but for the embryos we are adopting. They are our babies and we love them. But I would be lying if I said that I wasn't a little bit sad that so many people have to have a part in their conception and that some of that joy was taken from us. But I am sure that all thoughts of their conception will flee once I see 2 pink lines!