Plump and Pregnant

Being pregnant is an amazing thing. It really is. But the gestational period of a chubby girl is much different than that of a skinny chick. The other day someone said to me "Just wait till you can no longer see your feet!". My response: "You are supposed to be able to see your feet??". I haven't seen my feet in years! Well, I can if I bend over slightly, but not just look down and see them. I doubt if I can even see the ground from this vantage point!!! I rely upon a mirror to tell me if my shoes match! And this is just the beginning of the things that differ. Here are a few more:

Skinny chick: "Look, I am starting to show!"
Chubby chick: "Finally! I can quit sucking it in and just let it tall hang out! I am only 8 weeks and look 8 months, but who cares!"

Skinny chick: The books say that your vagina changes color during pregnancy. So you look and sure enough, it does.
Chubby chick: Really?? Hmm.... Does anyone have one of those mirrors with a long handle that they use to check under a car for a bomb? No? Well, then I will just have to take the book's word for it. I am not even sure my vagina is still down there!!

Skinny chick: she hears: "Wow! You are really 8 months along?? You barely look pregnant!"
Chubby chick: she hears: "Are you sure there is only one in there??"

Skinny chick: maternity clothes show off your cute little bump.
Chubby chick: maternity clothes come in 3 sizes: moo-moo, tent and oompa-loompah.

Skinny chick: she hears: "are you sure that you are eating enough?"
Chubby chick: she hears: "do you really need to eat that?"

Skinny chick: "I can't wait to do maternity photos!"
Chubby chick: "Yes, hello. Do you do maternity photos? You do? Good. Now, can you edit them? Hm, what do I need done? Well, I need some stretch marks erased. And can you fill in the middle of my B belly? And maybe erase the floppy part at the bottom? You can? Great!!! And it will only cost me another $50 bucks. Fantastic!"