Our journey through infertility, failed adoptions and now parenthood through the miracle of embryo adoption/donation.

Thursday, February 28, 2013

Why do we choose to fight?

Many things in this world are a fight. Some more than others. When someone fights for a good education, we praise them for their hard work. When someone fights for our freedom, we praise them for their sacrifice. When someone fights for justice, we praise them for their perseverance. But when an infertile fights to have a baby the accolades and praise are few and far between, if they even exist. We are often looked upon as crazy or even going against God's will. Maybe because freedom, justice and education are rarely ever just handed to us whereas a baby is when a couple is fertile. Even dogs, cats, cows and elephants have babies. There is no mystery to it, no struggle involved and can even be fun to create. Unless you are struggling with infertility. Maybe that is why our fight, our struggle is not always recognized.

So why do we do it then? To have what our friends have? To make ourselves feel normal? To have something to complain about? The tax deduction? No, we do it or that first kick. The first smile. The first I love You. We do it because even though our reproductive organs may not work, our heart still does. We have that same primal instinct to procreate as each and every other human and even animal. We fight for chance to feel that unconditional love from a tiny human being, whether from our womb or not. We fight leave a part of ourselves behind in the next generation.

This morning Maddie bumped my head with her head and she said "I sowwy, Mommy." Then she kissed me. THAT is what I fought for. And that is why I continue to fight for another child. It may not happen and there may come a time when the fight is over, but I will know that I gave it my all. And no matter what, it is worth the fight.


  1. Love this, thank you!!! Needed the encouragement while I'm in the midst of the fight!

  2. Thank you for posting this! Yes, it sometimes feel like we are fighting the world when we try to have our own babies. People look at us and think well, maybe it's not meant to be. Maybe God does not want us to have kids. But they don't say the same to people who are fighting cancer?

    So yes, we keep fighting! And I am so blessed to have found a great community among our fellow blogger =)

  3. This is seriously one of the best blog posts I've ever read. I mean that!


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