Our journey through infertility, failed adoptions and now parenthood through the miracle of embryo adoption/donation.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Finding the Funny in Infertility

Okay, we all know that infertility is not fun. The heartache, the waiting, the exams, the treatments. It all stinks!! But if we can't laugh at some of it we will go insane. So share something humorous that has happened to you!

We only have one lab that does a semen analysis and it happens to be over 30 minutes away. As you all know the specimen needs to be there within 30 minutes. So we decided to go there and provide the sample. Mistake! Big Mistake!! They did not have a "happy room" to do this in. What did they have?? They had a handicap bathroom. In the middle of the office complex that the lab was housed in. Hubby was not happy about having to do this there so I promised to help him out. Have you ever done...well...you know...in a public restroom?? First, it is nasty!! And I will never use a handicap bathroom anywhere a lab or urologist is present again!! Second, people knock. Constantly! Very distracting. And when you walk out together people give you "the look". We laugh now, but it was quite embarassing a the time. For the next 2 samples we got them at home and I dropped them off on the way to work. I drove like speed racer to get there in time, praying that I would not get pulled over.

Recently a friend of mine had to drop off a sample and they live even further than we do from the lab. After telling her how the bathroom was set up they decided do as we did and get it at home and drop it off. I also told her to store it in her bra. And not get pulled over. Two out of three isn't bad. They got pulled over!!! And they had to explain where they were going in such a hurry. I laughed so hard when she told me!!! How do you explain a cup of spermies nestled between your boobies? The cop was nice and let them go.

Another one for me was during my FET. I was told to have a partially full bladder. We left early to stop off at church so that our pastor could pray with us. I drank 2 glasses on the way to church but soon found I had to pee. And had 2 hours till baby time. So I went potty. And grabbed another water. By the time we arrived I had to go again. I sat there, doing the potty dance, waiting to be called back. The embryologist called me back to show us the pretty little embies. The whole time I was shaking my legs, praying I wouldn't wet myself. I finally asked the nurse if I could go to the bathroom and she said that I could. I ran like mad to the bathroom!! She waited outside of the door laughing at how much I went. Then after the FET I had to go again. This would have not been too bad had I not had to lay down for an hour. I thought that I would be fine, but then it happened. I peed! All over myself. Then I laughed. And peed some more. The nurse returned with the RE and a cathater. I filled that whole thing up, all while the nurse was laughing at how much I had to go. After they finished I lay there and wouldn't you know it, I peed again!!! And once my hour was up I ran to the bathroom again! I tell ya, the thing we go through to have a baby!!

So share it! What funny things have happened to you?


  1. Thank you SO MUCH for giving me a laugh today! I'm having a pretty ick morning and NEEDED it!

    I know we've had lots of funny along the way, but the only thing I can think of to contribute at the moment is from a billion years ago - I think it was my first follicle/endometrium scan on our first IVF cycle. The FS was cpointing out my follicles and saying my lining was nice and thick and I couldn't see anything but a fuzzy TV screen. So I said 'whatever - you could have told me you found a cat in there and I wouldn't have known the difference' and my husband had to leave the room to use the gents soon after. Apparently he thought I was making some, um, 'pussy' joke - but I was just nervous and couldn't see anything in the screen the FS could so just had said the first thing that came to my head!

    I guess giving myself a trigger injection in a friend's car in the middle of the suburbs while we were out geocaching together was pretty funny too. It was winter so very dark, and every shadow we were convinced was someone about to 'catch' us using syringes! :-)

  2. Thanks for the laughs.

    A long, long time ago, a friend of ours told us that we should be irresponsible - do "it" in places we shouldn't and that way we would get pregnant.

    Well, you know how that goes. We would stand on our heads for hours if it worked.

    So, we ended up behind a store that had been deserted "parking" when a cop pulled up. We drove off and he followed us and pulled us over. Apparently the spot was known by the police for drug use. We explained the situation (very red in the face) and he let us go.

    I bet he really enjoyed telling that story later.

  3. These clinics should really have a good room for the guys. That is awful but somewhat funny that you had to make do in the washroom. I don't think I could have done that!

  4. I remember when my husband had to drop off his sample and decided to do the deed at a Barnes & Noble next door to the lab! And I can totally relate to the peeing thing! I have felt like that too although never peed myself! ;-) Happy ICLW! (#72 & 106)

  5. LOL!

    I don't have anything like that. Not even close. I wish I did though.

  6. Okay I'll share! My estrace is suppository style, and they are little green pills, that discharge out green. Nice! (not) Anyway I had an u/s booked, and I said to the tech don't be surprised if it's green when it comes out. Snickering. She looked at me like I was an alien. As she takes out the u/s wand she can't not look, and she says well you really weren't kidding! LOL!

    I also like to 'forget' to tell the techs I don't have fallopian tubes, and then be like WHAT! What do you mean?!?! When they ask me about it! Teehee!!!

  7. Even though infertility is such a depressing subject, it's nice when we can find some humor in it. When my husband had to do his semen analysis, the bathroom in the doctor's office had a speaker in it so he could hear the awful music that they play in the waiting room. And he said the walls were so thin that he could hear patients in the next rooms. Not very motivational, but he was a trooper and got the job done!

  8. My husband had to do his first semen analysis in a public restroom too...Poor guy. After that, we either did it at the clinic in the "honeymoon suite" (as he called it)...or we would play "nurse" at home and I would get it for him..tee hee and then take it to our clinic (in my bra of course). Almost all of our visits were comical in some way because my husband just cannot contain himself so he was constantly asking my RE if he could look for lost keys and other items during my ultrsounds or cracking jokes about stirrups etc. I swear I would get so mad at him because I thought for sure I would laugh the little embryos out! Our RE's office was very small and it was like family...so we always did our best to stay light hearted and it really made for a great experience. There was a lot of laughter and joking most of our visits.


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