Our journey through infertility, failed adoptions and now parenthood through the miracle of embryo adoption/donation.

Monday, April 5, 2010

Getting Excited!

I must confess that last week was a bit rough for me. (And for those of you that have a hard time reading posts about pregnancy then I would skip this post. It is one that would have made me angry a year ago) I have always criticized women that were disappointed with the gender of their child. I mean, "how dare you not be happy that you are having a boy instead of a girl?!?! Or vice versa. You should just be grateful that you could have children at all. Do you know how many women want a baby and would be happy with any gender??" This is the diatribe that would be in my head each time I heard of someone that was unhappy with their unborn baby's gender. I was harsh. I was critical. I was right. And now I am one of them. It shames me to admit it.

Not that I didn't want a baby girl. I really, really do!! But I have had a boy planned for almost 5 months. I called the baby "he". I imagined a son. I just hadn't thought of a girl. My intuition was so strong. It wasn't even wishful thinking because in the beginning I really didn't care. But as time went on I felt so strongly that I was carrying a boy. Having a girl has really thrown me for a loop. There are so many reasons that I wanted a boy:

*I am the oldest of 3 children, yet the last to have a baby. Both of my siblings have girls. I wanted a boy to be the first at something.

*My sister and a good friend of mine both have a bunch of baby girl stuff. They are both so kind and want to share. It is all like new, but I want my baby to have her own things, not all hand-me-downs. I want her to be special.

*Little boys love their mommy the mostest.

All of these thoughts are stupid and irrational. I know it so don't judge the crazy, hormonal pregnant woman! I am doing enough of that myself. Since Thursday I have come to realize several things:

*Regardless of gender my baby is special.

*God chose for us to have a girl for a reason. THIS is the child that we are meant to have.

*Little girls are adorable and I am going to have a blast dressing her up and one day getting mani and pedis together.

*And though she will love her daddy the mostest I will still be special to her and she will still love me.


  1. Another thing that is great about having a girl. I know this isnt the case for everyone. But the norm is the boy when he grows up and gets married they end up spending alot of time with the girls parents and that set of grandparents get to be a little more a part of their lives. But with a girl.. A girl when she grows up just wants her mom! Youll get to be that to her! And I feel like there is a special bond with the kids and the moms parents. So most likely you are gonna get MORE out of having a girl in the long run. =)

    And I know people love to give their handme downs to you... save them for play and buy your girl all the new stuff you want! And because she is a girl and you have all those other handme downs she will have TONS of clothes! All the new stuff you buy her and then all those other ones! Shell be nice and spoiled!!

  2. Aww. I wanted a girl both times and got a boy. But honestly I am so enamored now with the thought of my "boys" that I think I would be disapointed if they told me I was having a girl.

    It is normal to feel that way, don't worry. Soon all you will be thinking of is pink, lol.

    Also, I like to look at it this way: A family will have what it needs. I guess yours needed a sweet girl. ;)

  3. You will be an awesome girl mom! You will have a blast with the fashion side of it if nothing else. If you get hand me clothes you can always use your clothes budget to accessorize your daughter....meaning buy purses.

  4. Jess- you were made to have a daughter! I can just picture you and her, when she is a teen and thinks she knows everything and you will be able to put her in her place, and then go get your nails done together! Think of all the shopping you will do! : )

    I understand about the "1st" of something. We had the 6th grandbaby on one side and the 5th on the other so we got a bunch of hand-me-downs. I just said "thankyou" and left them in the bag I got them in and got new stuff! (I did look through some of it and if I saw something I LOVED I kept it. Hey I like free stuff!)

    Soon you will feel a link to the baby girl! : )

  5. I will admit the daddy/daughter relationship is a little tough to swallow at times, but I AM a daddy's girl, so I was excited that my husband and daughter would share that.

    I totally hear you about being the first with a baby boy too. I'm just hoping our next is a boy. I feel like it will be, but we all know intuition can be wrong. ;)


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