Our journey through infertility, failed adoptions and now parenthood through the miracle of embryo adoption/donation.

Thursday, March 31, 2011

Where'd ya go?

Do you ever log into Blogger and notice that you have lost a follower? Do you ever wonder where they went? Why they quit following? I do! I lost one recently and I am not sure why. I doubt that it was anything that I posted because it was during a week that I had not posted anything new. I knew that "crossing over" to the "fertile side" would cost me a few peeps. Those I understand. I am a Christian and some of my posts may have been offensive to those that are not. I get that. I don't apologize, but I get it. It is the random ones that fall off that I wonder about. But then I think of the blogs that I quit following and I wonder if they wonder where I went.

I used to follow almost any blog but I was missing updates amidst all of the clutter. Now I have a few guidelines to help me choose who to follow. First, I almost always follow anyone pursuing EA. It is near and dear to my heart and I want to show my support. Second, I follow those that make me laugh. Third, I follow bloggers needing support whether from loss, failed treatments, or disrupted adoption. Lastly, I try to follow those with few followers.

As for choosing who I will no longer follow I have a few guidelines for that as well. I have quit following bloggers that use a lot of profanity. I don't mean having a bad day and posting a few wirty dords (remember saying that as a kid?? =D ) but those that let the F-bomb fly will usually be dropped. I also don't follow someone that is blatantly anti-God. Not everyone I follow is a Christian and that is fine, but I don't follow someone posting offensive things about my Lord.

A few other reasons I might quit following bloggers: they rarely post updates, their blog is difficult to read (small white font on a dark background for one), or they are no longer posting about infertility and I find myself not reading them any longer. Every time I quit following someone I feel guilty, though it is not personal. I am sure that many of them never even notice, but I still feel bad.

Do you ever quit following someone? Why? Do you feel bad about it? And how do you choose who to follow?


  1. I TOTALLY wonder the same thing! I have lost 2 followers since I've been blogging and its bugged me ever since ha! Guess we'll never know ;)

  2. I have seen followers fall off before and I wondered why a while back, but then I think they just can't identify with what I write anymore. Maybe they could at some point and they can't now. No matter why they leave, I wish them the best.

    I quit following blogs when I leave comment after comment after comment and they never stop by my blog to say hello. It takes me a couple months to realize it usually. I figure if they don't want to say hello to me, they might not want me following them, and that's cool. We can't always be everyone's cup of tea.

  3. Mhh, I wonder that too. In fact I don't know why one should openly unfollow...is it not enought o just stop reading? For example, I generally keep up to date with the blgs I have listed in my side bar, and don't use blogroll at all. So every now and again I do a clean up of the sidebar, remove those who have not posted in ages and that's about it. I don't think I ever removed myself from a followers list unless the blog had been cancelled or relocated. So like you, I do wonder where they go...
    Love, Fran

    ps: I passed on your blog link to a friend who is considering EA, if a stranger emails you, it was becasue of me!

  4. Okay, this is too funny! Since I posted this I lost another follower. Guess I offended someone......

  5. I haven't noticed if I've lost any followers. I haven't quit following too many people but I have about the same quidelines as you- I definitely hate the bad language and then sometimes I just get bored or if they don't update often and I forget their story. I love to follow the uplifting, encouraging blogs- not the "Debbie Downers" who are always bitter and complaining.

  6. HI Jessica, Here form icilw and glad to have stumbled onto your little corner of the internet. I too find myself following bloggers who have a similar story to ours. and as my story changes so do the blogs that I find myself following. and then every now and again, I clean out my list, usually only to help keep it manageable. I never thought about anyone actually noticing that I was gone!


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