Since I have gotten pregnant hubby and I have been practising celibacy. Not on purpose, mind you, but out of necessity. In the beginning it was because there was a scare that I would lose the baby. Then after the first trimester the doctor gave the all clear but when we would I would cramp and spot. Hubby would not believe me that this was normal and refused to touch me. Since I really did not feel "in the mood" this was okay with me. I have read where some women are always in the mood, but I am not one of those. At all. Hubby was kind of disappointed over this at first, but has since gotten used to it. Especially once Maddie began moving a lot. It is kind of creepy getting busy with your belly moving around, knowing your child is right there.
Well, last night I decided that maybe a roll in the hay would be fun. Not so much the idea of sex, but the thought that maybe it would send me into labor is what made me all hot and bothered. So I waited for hubby to come to bed and was getting ready to ravish him. Okay, I am 9 months pregnant. There would be no ravishing, just me laying there like a beached whale. As he was walking to our room Maddie woke up. She is never awake at this time of night, but she must have known something was up. She moved like I have never seen her move before! Hubby rarely gets to feel her move, but this time she put on a show for him. I think that she was practising her audition for the next Jackie Chan movie!! I thought for sure she was going to kick her foot right through my belly button. This continued for about 20 minutes. If she was trying to kill the mood she was quite successful.
By this time the mood was gone, but the thoughts of starting labor pushed me on. Only to be shot down. Hubby was terrified! I am currently on bed rest and hubby refuses to touch me without a doctor's note. My OB has not said that I can't have sex, but he has not said that can either. So hubby is not gonna come near me at all. He wants me to ask at my next appointment. And for some reason I am embarrassed to ask! Which is crazy!! My OB has seen my lady bits more this pregnancy than my hubby has! There should be no shame left. So on Wednesday I am supposed to ask my OB and bring home a note for hubby!! This should be fun!
The good thing about not getting down and dirty last night was that the gas that I had been holding in while trying to be sexy, I was able to let it loose! Ahhhh! Sweet relief!!!!
thanks for the laugh today! :D
ReplyDeleteHoly cow- you always make me laugh! Just remind your hubby, it'll be at least 6 weeks before you can "get busy" after baby arrives!
ReplyDeleteAhhahahah!! great post jess!! Love a good laugh!
ReplyDeleteFran