Our journey through infertility, failed adoptions and now parenthood through the miracle of embryo adoption/donation.

Sunday, August 21, 2011

I've been thinking about them

This week is Maddie's first birthday. It is hard to believe that an entire year has already passed. This week has been a time of reminiscing about the journey that brought us here. I remember how hopeless our situation was in early 2009. I remember getting the call that we had been matched with embryos. But I am also thinking a lot about "them", the donor couple. The people that gave us the gift of Maddie. I wonder if they wonder about those 6 tiny embryos.

Each night when I kiss Maddie good night I thank God for their selfless gift. Every morning when I see her smile I can't help but feel a connection to these faceless, nameless people that changed our lives forever. I look in Maddie's eyes and try to see her genetic family. While some recipient parents may want to block out that their child is not genetically related I look for the little signs that prove that she is not. Maddie looks and acts so much like us that I tend to forget her heritage. But to forget it is to deny who she is. And it denies that gift that her genetic parents gave us. I am proud of how Maddie came to be. I am humbled by their gift. I can't wait until she is old enough to understand about her beginnings. It is a miracle, plain and simple. And I want her to love this couple as much as I do. She may never get the opportunity to meet them and they may never know about her existence, but I want her to always know about them and how much they loved her to give her this chance at live. And maybe one day God will bring us all together so that I may thank them in person.


  1. Happy birthday, Maddie, and happy BIRTH day to you.

  2. Happy Birthday to Maddie. We also have a daughter (9months) from anonymous embryo donation. I often wonder about them and if they think about what happened to their 9 embryos. I am constantly in awe that someone just gave her to us...no strings attached...nothing...just gave her...wow. So very selfless....I don't know if I could have done it. But I am SOOOO happy they did.

    Congrats on your first year with your beautiful daughter who is sooo lucky to have you.


  3. It is such a selfless gift, I think it's wonderful that you will be sharing it with her when she is older. Congrats on a great first year!

    ICLW #60

  4. Happy Birthday to your beautiful girl! Your post was veru touching.

  5. Beautifully written post. I often wonder about the people who made Carder's life possible as well. Every day I am so thankful to them for the gift they have given us.

  6. Really beautiful post in honor of your daughters first birthday.


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