I've been thinking about them

This week is Maddie's first birthday. It is hard to believe that an entire year has already passed. This week has been a time of reminiscing about the journey that brought us here. I remember how hopeless our situation was in early 2009. I remember getting the call that we had been matched with embryos. But I am also thinking a lot about "them", the donor couple. The people that gave us the gift of Maddie. I wonder if they wonder about those 6 tiny embryos.

Each night when I kiss Maddie good night I thank God for their selfless gift. Every morning when I see her smile I can't help but feel a connection to these faceless, nameless people that changed our lives forever. I look in Maddie's eyes and try to see her genetic family. While some recipient parents may want to block out that their child is not genetically related I look for the little signs that prove that she is not. Maddie looks and acts so much like us that I tend to forget her heritage. But to forget it is to deny who she is. And it denies that gift that her genetic parents gave us. I am proud of how Maddie came to be. I am humbled by their gift. I can't wait until she is old enough to understand about her beginnings. It is a miracle, plain and simple. And I want her to love this couple as much as I do. She may never get the opportunity to meet them and they may never know about her existence, but I want her to always know about them and how much they loved her to give her this chance at live. And maybe one day God will bring us all together so that I may thank them in person.