Our journey through infertility, failed adoptions and now parenthood through the miracle of embryo adoption/donation.

Monday, February 1, 2010


I know that for many this is understood, but for me it came as a shock. For so many years I have focused on getting pregnant that I think that I forgot what it meant. I have shopped for baby stuff on 2 separate occasions in the past and neither time was I pregnant. Both times it was for the impending arrival of a baby though, just through adoption. Though neither worked out I think that my mind has associated a baby with adoption, not pregnancy. Since getting pregnant I have thought a lot about pregnancy itself, but not about the baby. The other day it dawned on me that there is a baby in there! There is no turning back now. And it scares me!!! I have wanted this for so long but the reality of it is overwhelming. I am sure that this is normal for all first time moms, though for me it is even more so as I have been trying for so very long. The longer that I have tried the less that I believed that it would actually happen. Now that it has I am having a hard time wrapping my mind around it all. There is going to be a little person completely dependent on me. I can no longer grab my purse and run to the store. Sleeping in will become a thing of the past. Though excited about these changes they are taking some time to get used to. That must be why God gives us 9 months to adjust!


  1. What's so scary for me is that I'm having these thoughts now and I'm not pregnant yet!
    I'm hoping that the next few months will give you the opportunity to wrap your mind around the idea!
    You're gonna be a GREAT Mom!

  2. I TOTALLY relate... Still so hard for me to believe also!

  3. I agree, it is scary when you actually think about what having a baby means- and I'm not pregnant yet, either! All of that will disappear when you see that baby for the first time though, at least that's what everybody says! =)

  4. It is sooo true! You want it to happen. You plan for it to happen. And then OH MY WORD it happened! I remember not worrying about when the baby got here just HOW it got here! ha ha! I was soooo scared of that but there was no turning back! =) It is a huge adjustment but one you will glady accept! Im just still soooo happy for you! Cant wait til you get to hold your baby in your arms!

  5. I've had this revolation myself a few times with adoption. Its like you get so focused on the working to get there and you forget what your working for until all the sudden it hits you between the eyes. "Holy Crap - a baby!"

  6. I remember thinking I have HOW many months to prepare for this one? We had a couple of weeks with our first adopted baby and only 22hours for baby #2 and baby #3! So I wasn't too sad that our babies came early! I'm impatient! But I understand how hard it is to wrap your mind around this miracle! It is still sometimes hard for me to believe our babies were in me! Somehow I don't think you'll have any problems adjusting to a baby in the house! :)


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