Our journey through infertility, failed adoptions and now parenthood through the miracle of embryo adoption/donation.

Monday, June 21, 2010

Hello everyone! Welcome!

Today starts June's ICLW. Wondering just what that is? Follow the link on the left of my page to learn more. For those visiting from ICLW, welcome to my little corner of the world! Are you wondering if this blog is interesting? Should you follow it? Let me tell you, I think that I am pretty darn interesting!! But then again I am a bit of a narcissist.

Still on the fence about following me? Here is a little about me to help you decide:

My name is Jess and I have been married to my hubby for 12 years next month. I feel way too young to have been married this long!!! Hubby and I began ttc just a few months after we got married and like all naive newlyweds we were certain that it would only take a month. Two at the most. HA! I think that joke was on us!! Even before the year mark my impatient self jumped on the infertility roller coaster and began testing. I could list all of the tests that we both had but that would take you an hour to read. And let's face it, it is just not that interesting!! But the results were b-a-d! ME: endo, mild PCOS, blocked tube (with good ovary) and damaged ovary (with blocked tube, go figure!). And if all of that wasn't enough hubby started out with a low sperm count to slowly morph into a count of zero. Big fat goose egg!!!

So what's a girl to do with poor quality eggs that can't get through and no sperm?? You adopt! Or at least you attempt it. Two disastrous attempts later we are back at square one. So our next step was to try donor sperm. Guess what?? That didn't work either. By this time we had been married 10 years and I was in my 30's and my clock was ticking loudly!! We were down to our last hope, IVF with donor sperm and possibly donor egg. The thoughts of it made me squeamish. To spend that much money and still no guarantee of a baby?? We just couldn't afford to do that and began thinking about maybe trying adoption again. We ended up doing the best of both worlds: Embryo Adoption! Not only would we adopt a child but I would have the opportunity to carry the baby. How awesome is that??

In June of 2009 we began our journey of embryo adoption. I had surgery in July and had to wait 3 months to heal and for the call for an embryo match. Two weeks before I was physically ready to begin we got "the call". We accepted the embryos and things moved very quickly from there. On 12/12/09 we had two precious little embryos placed in my womb. Six days later I saw something I had never seen before: Two Pink Lines!!! Another 9 tests and 2 blood tests confirmed it: We were PREGNANT! Sadly, one of our little embies did not survive but the other one is a determined a little bugger. I are currently 30 weeks pregnant with an adopted little girl. I am still in shock in awe! After 11 years of trying I had honestly given up all hope. We are forever thankful for the couple that selflessly donated their precious little snowflakes to us.

That about catches you up to date. Right now we are waiting on our little girl and I am learning how to fit in with fertiles. In my heart I am still the infertile gal sitting on the sidelines. I doubt that I will ever be completely comfortable in the fertile world and honestly, I am not sure if I want to be. I have the heart of an infertile, born from the pain and sorrow that only fellow infertiles can ever understand. Finding a new normal is not easy!


  1. What an amazing journey! Congrats on your little girl!! Wishing you all the best as you head toward the finish line of this pregnancy.

    happy iclw!

  2. I bawl every time I read your story.. Still so incredibly happy for you! Yay 30 weeks! Amazing! Wonderful! Stinking Awesome!!!

  3. wow! Your story brought tears to my eyes! And you are so right...a new normal is so difficult to navigate! Congrats on 30 weeks and on a precious baby girl! I am a new follower from ICLW and can't wait to see where your journey takes you next!

  4. How wonderful that after such a long and arduous road, you were blessed with such a miracle--and through something amazing like EA!!! I can relate on many levels!! Praying that the next 10 (or so, give or take!) weeks go by quickly and smoothly, but that you are able to enjoy every second as you don't know how much you'll miss them after! Really--you will!!!!


    Lori ICLW 105

  5. Oh, I have tears in my eyes just reading your amazing story. I'm so happy for you to have reached the 30 week mark. Truly a miracle!

    Happy ICLW
    ~Jem (#56)

  6. Thirty weeks! Wow! I'm just over half way to that point and it still doesn't seem real.

    I really truly believe that we will never fit in with the fertiles, even after carrying a healthy baby to term. IF changes us, and some of those changes are not necessarily bad. IF teaches us compassion, appreciation for what comes, and not to assume anything about anyone's family. But as IFers who have managed to escape the island, I think we are in a unique position to help educate others and provide support for those still waiting.

    Happy ICLW (and sorry for the soapbox) :)

  7. What a story! Wow. Just Wow.

    Jo from ICLW

  8. Congrats on your miracle. I hope motherhood is all you hope it to be.

    We've been married for 10 years this year and ttc for 11yrs....

    Here for ICLW
    Rach @
    #26 The Gal Who Wants to be Anywhere But Where She Is
    #27 Miss Ruby

  9. What a wonderful story you have. Congratulations on your little miracle. We've also been married and ttc for a LONG time. You've given me some hope.


  10. What an amazing story. Congratulations!!!


  11. Wonderful! I never even knew such things were possible!! Kudos to you!


    I can't wait to read more!

    ICLW #180

  12. This is an amazing story. I look forward to reading more.

  13. Do you have any interest in doing a guest post about embryo adoption? My blog is part of anon profit, Parenthood for Me.org. We offer education and financial support for those suffering through IF and goingt through adoption.

  14. I "know" you but haven't been reading that long so it was nice to read your introduction!

  15. We just celebrated 12 years of marriage too. Congrats! And what a beautiful story!! As an adopted child, I am so touched by your journey.

  16. Beautiful story. Congratulations on your pregnancy!

    ICLW #14

  17. Just amazing. After reading your story, you've given me something to really think about - embryo donation could really be a viable path for us... off to do some more research. Also hopw you don't mind a new follower - I'll be digging through your older posts to check out your donation journey :)

    Happy ICLW!
    ~Keiko, Hannah Wept, Sarah Laughed

  18. Happy ICLW! Wow, what a rollercoaster. Congrats on the wonderful abundance of life in your world!

  19. Hi There! Here from ICLW....

    After we finally got our BFP and our little twins arrived, we froze 11 embryos. We donated them last year to another couple and hoped for the best. It wasn't their time but I have no regrets.

    So glad I found your blog.....


  20. Congrats to you! It's been such a long road for you both. Hoping to hear the rest of your story!

    Pixie, from ICLW

    Cheese Curds and Kimchi

  21. Wow! I can so relate to the whole not fitting in to the fertile world and not really wanting to. You wrote that so poignantly! After my 3 IVF miracles, my heartstrings are still so strongly pulled as I read story after story. I blog now to help others with the stress and I would love to feature your success story! Check out my newest post for the info and link! Happy ICLW!


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