Our journey through infertility, failed adoptions and now parenthood through the miracle of embryo adoption/donation.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010


Maddie will be three weeks old tomorrow and we are still adjusting to the changes around here. It is amazing how someone so small can change your whole life!! I am healing well from my c-section though my days in the hospital bed have really messed my back up. I went to the chiropractor today and hope that will help some. I am having migraines every few days from it and I am ready for them to be over. Not sleeping isn't helping. Miss Maddie sleeps....during the day. Night time, not so much. And momma is tired!!!

I have found that I love being a mommy, but it is a bit overwhelming. Not the actual parenting and care taking part. But the I-finally-have-a-baby-after-11 years-and-no-one-can-take-her-away-from-me part. Many times it just doesn't seem real to me. Though at 3 am it seems very real to me!!! I still think like an infertile and it is odd for me to talk diapers and sleep schedules. I still cringe while walking past the baby department at Target. Old habits die hard.

I am also missing being pregnant. I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that there is no guarantee that I will ever get to do this again. I loved being pregnant and I want another baby in a year or so and it saddens me that it will never be an easy road to get pregnant.

All in all things are going well. If I can get her to sleep at night I will be able to say that things are great!! But until then I will cherish these midnight moments together.

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